February 19, 2007

Keeping it Real

Posted in Keeping it Read at 4:45 am by relief1

Verily your children are a test for you.

Yes, Allah speaks the truth and my children are a test for me.

I am striving to do what I can to keep my children on the siratul mustaqeen. I have a 6 month old girl, 4 year old girl, 6 year old girl, 7 year old boy, and 9 year old girl. 

Everyone dotes on the baby, but the rest fight amongst each other like cats and dogs. I’m trying to do what I can to raise them islamically although I am overwhelmed with my responsibilities right now. My family live hundreds of miles away and my only friend is my husband, so al hamdulilaah for him.

I feel alone although my dad sent me the card I initially posted stating that ‘You Are Not Alone’. Loneliness stems from not being understood, not being able to express how you are feeling or have those feeling acknowledged or validating, so while I am not alone on a desert island I can be lonely at times. I don’t like being lonely or isolated so I keep searching for a better place, although hubby says that wherever we go it’s always the same thing.  In a way he is right as I am a firm believer in the fact that you never miss what you have until its gone, gone, gone.

I miss living in Maryland/Virgnina area and believe that was the best muslim community by far at the time that I was living there. If I go back it won’t be the same as many of the people have moved, married, made hijrah and the like but still I remininensce as I remember what was and hope for what could be.  People change though and yet they still remain the same.