Why is it that men have a double standard when dealing with ex-spouses? Granted they can usually easily remarry them as a cowife but why I don’t get it.

My zoge is out of the country visiting parents and his 2 kids and recently seperated wife.  He emails me from her house and says he had to use the internet, which he did and his mom and sister don’t have it at their house so he had to use hers of course.  He had mentioned this before he left but said that he would be in the house and she would be at a friends next door as she has friends who are her neighbors. 

I guess when push came to shove, she just went in another room while he used the internet so the story goes. She was there in the house but the kids were there so you know and his son is 13 and his nephew 14 were there so it’s okay.  This is after he took them all grocery shopping as he said they didn’t have a lot of food in the house.  Al hamdulilaah that he bought them groceries but couldn’t he have given her the money or given his son the money and let them shop on their own.

Something just doesn’t sit right with me about this scenario.  I’m sure he wouldn’t like me with my ex-husband grocery shopping or using the internet at his house.

So any how – he is out of the country visiting his family and I am here holding down 2 businesses of his and our 5 kids, so I am overworked and stressed and he is being the typical male. I have to manage his business make sure the employees show up, handle irate customers, get kids ready for school, cook dinner, clean, fix and repair computers, handle payroll, check his email and respond to pressing issues.

I’m just exasperated really with him and his islamic adab and had hoped for better and well this is what I get. For some reason I don’t feel jealous, far from it. I just feel a bit perturbed that he would so zealously violate the free mixing standards set out by Allah.  I don’t think he intended to do this but it appears a bit flaky and when I ask if he would like to have her back, he doesn’t know?

And as the song goes, ‘ Why do fools fall in love?’ Do you get it?

It’s been a heck of a month thus far.  My husband has been planning his trip to London to see his family and finally bought the ticket today al hamdulilaah.  I’m glad he’s getting an opportunity to go and hope that his business doesn’t go under during my management of it while he’s away.

I think he made me real paranoid as he told me that most of his clientele are very anti-muslim and if some of his customers walk in see him and walk out – so Allah knows how they would take to someone clearly Muslim in hijab so I just feel uncomfortable handling the reigns but inshallah things will go well.

My kids are getting better it seems. They are more manageable and they are starting to learn this deen.  I gave two of them and islamic quiz and they knew the answers to almost everything I asked al hamdulilaah so they are retaining what they learned.

My 4 year old has a new thing she picked up around the way it’s called:

“Talk to the hand” and she places her hand up in front of you.  This is done when you are saying something she doesn’t want to hear or have time for. She’ll just put her hand up in a stop signal fashion and advise you to talk to the hand. Such precious rudeness I was quite taken aback!!

Little gems like this come flowing from her mouth like water out of a faucet. I still haven’t made it home to see my family as I was sick the last time I planned to go, then my mom got out of dodge with a quick trip to Florida for sun and no stress.

She planned and went the same week I was planning on going to see her.

I would like to move from my current locale because I just can’t take it any more. The friendliest people are the Wal-Mart cashiers! Wal-Mart staff are the only people I see regularly – perhaps I should buy stock in Wal-Mart.

For Muslims trying to save money I recommend Amana Mutual Funds by Saturna Capital. I moved my IRA there that my previous employer had given me and al hamdulilaah the money is gaining strength after strength.  It is a good mechanism to save money for hajj, hijrah, or just general family savings.

I’m falling asleep on the keyboard so I will sign off for now.

Well today is another day of woe be me at my lovely riba bank of america!

I am searching for a new bank as I am tired of the customer disservice. I’m not looking for great interest rates or loan products, just someone who can receive my deposits with a smile and give me access to the money the next day so I can write checks as need be.  Unfortunately that Bank of America is totally callous, cold and uncaring.  Truth that I am not the only one can be read at a website called www.bankofamericasucks.com !  Now this site gave me much a great laugh – the comments and insights from the BOA dissatisfied customers and even the BOA employees who come on board to defend their company from it’s not so customer friendly business practices.

This bank if messing up our company’s payroll.  We make a deposit to cover payroll which must be done this week. Never in the past have they put a hold but this particular day my husband did the deposit and maybe his Taliban looks made them think ole lets hold off on releasing the funds on this one.  So we have to wait 7 days to clear as opposed to one day.  I go in the next day to talk to the branch manager and they refuse to budge. Our employees want their money, they are broke and we only pay once a month as it is so I have to finagle all these different accounts, and pull money from out of the sky, and hope our current customers pay us in cash so we can deposit money before payday tomorrow.

Then I go searching online for a new bank. I type in the bank name and then complaints in Google and most come up with pages and pages of complaints of customer disservice.  I keep looking at these voucher checks that I just bought and thinking how I won’t be able to use them at the new bank and convincing myself to somehow stay there until my checks are used. But with less that 10 employees and a monthly payday it will be a year before these checks are used.  I also am forced to go in there and deposit the daily cash receipts for the business so even if I get a new bank the old Bank of America will still have to be used.

I’ve never felt hatred for a bank before this week and I wish it wasn’t like this but they keep doing things like this and I know they wouldn’t care if 100 million people withdrew their money, so my taking my little pennies out won’t affect them one iota.